Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
