you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
