This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
