god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
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I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
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It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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