I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
