if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
