Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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