Kareoke will never be a sober sport
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
