Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
