____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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