we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize