Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
