I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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