Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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