all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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