no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
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