No subtext here. People are naked.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
