My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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