Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Randomize
