so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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