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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????

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• (818): View more from California

  remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.

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• (510): View more from California

  I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms

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• (917): View more from New York City

  my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce

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  27 Unforgettable Hookup Texts

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• (415): View more from California

  i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth

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• (518): View more from New York

  College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.

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• (941): View more from Florida

  Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.

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• (313): View more from Michigan

  Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now

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• (772): View more from Florida

  Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.

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  19 Groupies Confess What It’s Really Like To Hook Up With Famous Rockstars

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (714): View more from California

  The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.

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• (626): View more from California

  I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for

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• (209): View more from California

  I will pee on everything he values.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed

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