Texts From Last Night

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  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina

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  (773): You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina http://tfl.nu/1zwu
  Replies (2) Good night (571) Bad night (962)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hey kate, how is it?

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.

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  (267): Hey kate, how is it? (610): sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving. http://tfl.nu/94qm
  Replies (14) Good night (700) Bad night (2891)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame

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  (978): my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame http://tfl.nu/nyuc
  Replies (11) Good night (867) Bad night (3146)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...

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  (407): Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup... http://tfl.nu/530r
  Replies (26) Good night (3428) Bad night (962)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.

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  (708): She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin. http://tfl.nu/wbej
  Replies (24) Good night (1822) Bad night (6729)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.

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  (570): He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom. http://tfl.nu/2ayy
  Replies (5) Good night (794) Bad night (3380)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me

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  (203): Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me http://tfl.nu/81ac
  Replies (12) Good night (4544) Bad night (1512)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.

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  (302): Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing. http://tfl.nu/c56c
  Replies (2) Good night (920) Bad night (1108)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.

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  (701): Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more. http://tfl.nu/i6gm
  Replies (7) Good night (1244) Bad night (521)
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  (310): View more from California

  Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today

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  (310): Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today http://tfl.nu/yb5r
  Replies (5) Good night (929) Bad night (390)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."

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  (478): I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you." http://tfl.nu/9ihc
  Replies (1) Good night (254) Bad night (808)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.

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  (412): i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms. http://tfl.nu/uje7
  Replies (6) Good night (498) Bad night (199)
• Favorite

  (770): View more from Georgia

  His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis

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  (770): His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis http://tfl.nu/4skm
  Replies (6) Good night (424) Bad night (324)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO

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  (716): Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO http://tfl.nu/9nqy
  Replies (2) Good night (384) Bad night (255)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...

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  (781): I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded... http://tfl.nu/sk2i
  Replies (3) Good night (196) Bad night (649)

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