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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.

  (1-256): View more from Alabama

  That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.

  (1-256): View more from Alabama

  Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.

  (1-412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.

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• (239): View more from Florida

  I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (425): View more from Washington

  If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.

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• (815): View more from Illinois

  She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?

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• (217): View more from Illinois

  I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs

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• (425): View more from Washington

  So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep

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