what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I'm determined to sit on that face.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
