chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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