i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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