so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
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