My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
