I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
