no you cant smoke seaweed
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
Randomize
