Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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