We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
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