id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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