a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
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