He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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