i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
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