I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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