I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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