Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
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