It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
