Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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