This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
This beer is not sobering me up at all
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize
