Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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