just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
