At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
