I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Randomize
