So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
