I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Randomize
