So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Randomize