Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Randomize
