lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
