I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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