am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I'm sobbing to NWA
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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